Remission Remission Remission - I love those words. We are in Remission!!!!
And better still we got to go home for the day yesterday AND today AND if all going well, tonight too.
Just us 3 girls, 3 generations at home - our home.
I am not sure who was more excited yesterday - Allegra or me. We packed and got ready to go. Allegra dressed up in her purple with her chosen hat and bag with Mason in it. Pharmacy came around, handed over ALL of Allegra's medicines, wow what a package! The doctors then came to check Allegra over and talk it through, all good. The psychologist came and asked how I was feeling and what were we going to do - "I feel great, we are great, we will be fine and we are going home to play, sleep, eat and just be". The Oncology co-ordinator came with tears of joy and gave us a be back time, 7-7.30pm ready for 8pm medicines.
"See you, Bye, See you, Bye - come on Mum, lets go!"
Mar Ma, Alegra and I walked briskly down the corridor, Allegra kept saying she was ready. Very cute and clever. I am sure she was ready for a lot of reasons, I do know one though - she was ready for a change in scenery.
My little Allegra beamed in the car, so much to look at out the window, cars, people, prams, trams. To be honest I felt a little the same, what a great feeling. Freedom.
Once again Allegra amazed me: she took to home with no problems. She investigated her toys and then spotted the bookcase, crawled straight over to it - dragging behind her were her formulae bottle and pump and vac dressing pump. It was a huge and heavy load. But then nothing surprises me with my little Allegra and her determination. Does she get that from me? She was off to read her favourite books. Allegra has not crawled for months.
Such an achievement and sense of freedom and independence for her.
She still had Christmas presents that she hadn't opened, it truly was like Christmas again.
We slept together in our king size bed, soundly. No machine beeps, no-one coming through the doors, no noise at all. It was complete silence and bliss. Gosh I have missed our bed and sleeping in it with my little Allegra, both of us together.
I have a new appreciation for the nurses - drawing up and giving medicines. Allegra has medicine every 2 hours and it seems to come around fast. I double-checked, triple-checked and then checked again before giving it to her then went back and checked again. Something else to get used to but I will.
After a lovely day at home unfortunately all good things come to an end and it was time to leave. :( Allegra packed her bag with some toys and books to show the nurses and said ready.
She waved bye to home - again so accepting of her situation. Allegra knew we were going back to hospital, she was telling us. We parked the car, got out and my little Allegra immediately said "bye car" and waved. She is just the cutest baby and I am so proud of her.
When we got into her hospital room she was ready to leave again. She asked for more walk. Then settled straight away after her tiring day.
Little did she realise that we could be going home again - in the morning.
We are currently waiting for the doctors to come and review Allegra after a very restless night but this is not going to hold us back. I am confident that I can nurse her in the peace and quiet of our home and with my Mum's help and support.
Allegra's pain and discomfort is her little tummy getting used to the feeds and learning to work again. So sad as she is going to be very sick with the Chemo coming up, tomorrow that is. Gotta go.
See you, Bye we have places to go. HOME